Reptiles

Reptiles
Silly Grins

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

M&M's

"Microaggressions" and "Macro Smacks"


Featuring:

Georgia Bold
and 
 
Courier

*****

“There’s a difference?”

“Heck yes. Hypersensitivity is one thing. However, the Mac Smack...it smarts, makes your eyes tear up.  But that’s the least of your worries when one of those is served up (or shoved down your sorry-ass throat). That Le Roayal with Cheese, the Big Kahuna of a wallop carries much more than what leaves a little swelling and momentary discomfort. Bees sting, but only once.  Practically harmless to most people, unless they swarm."


 
"The Japanese honeybees (Apis cerana japonica) forming a "bee ball" in which two hornets (Vespa simillima xanthoptera) are engulfed and being heated. The body heat trapped by the ball will overheat and kill the hornets.Yokohama, Kanagawa prefecture, Honshu Island,Japan."

"The cumulative effect of those nasty little 'cognitive habits' – the fearful ignorance of the waitress, the preemptively terrified pale-faced shoe salesman who didn’t approach the umber family of four, but instead practically leaped over to cling onto the khaki college kid who was obviously just killing time before the movie started… the cumulative effect of anything that’s simply allowed to build up can make anyone sick.”
  
"Kitty-chan Barf Bag"
“Look, under normal circumstances, the honeybee posse poses no more of a threat than a passing irritation.  Something you normally can’t feel through your thick hide.  Not that you aren’t sensitive to it; you’re just not that sensitive.  Hang on... you might have to roll down the window.”

"Uh...?"(Looking confused)

“Now, ‘Le Smack’, that skullfuck-of-a-punch carries much more weight, a deep-sting, if you will, that is far more than your mere ego simply fuckin’ with you.”

“Excuse me…I don’t quite get it.”

“And it is good that you don’t. Okay. Let’s try a little humor. You know that joke, the one that goes, ‘How do you save a ‘whatever-it-is’ from drowning?’”

“A ‘whatever’… you mean something like me?”

(Acknowledging nod)

“Yeah.” Way back when, it was sort of funny the first time he’d heard Andreas tell it. Yeah, 'funny' because we both knew the sick truth behind it, which isn’t so funny at all.

“Well, I just might be able to tell you how to save a ‘gai-jin’ from drowning... once they take their boot off my face." 
(polite & nervous laughter)


 
"But I might need to dry off first.”  
(followed by a backslap, wink and a smile)

“Here are some towels.”

“Thank you. So, you do get it after all.” 

"I'm trying." 

6 comments:

  1. Man, you can change the name to whatever they like or makes them feel comfortable but it's still racism and ignorance.

    Over analysis causes paralysis.

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    Replies
    1. Misunderstandings, cultural differences, repeated instances of derogatory inferences...

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  2. The previous chimpanzee-cage keeper found a new job and quit. The new keeper looked forward to the challenge of working with the chimps and approached his job with great enthusiasm. Things went smoothly for the most part, but every once in a while, the chimps would congregate and when the keeper's back was turned, he was pelted with a clod of poo. When he spun around to face the chimps, they looked away. When he left the cage area, their screams sounded like mad laughter...

    And the keeper thought to himself, I could put something in your food or I could just toss a lit match in that dry grass over there and walk away.

    And, he smiled to himself as he removed his soiled shirt for the washing...

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    Replies
    1. Oh man... I can just see the cage-keeper walking across the dry grass the next morning, ready to 'accidentally' leave his wards with the magnifying glass used in the lesson that day. Only, when he leaves, there won't be any mad laughter in the screams he hears coming from the caged area. Maybe he'll pause, for a moment of contemplation while he looks at the fire extinguisher, hose, and axe.

      Or maybe, maybe he'll just be in too much of a hurry to get home to do his laundry. In a hurry to get home while there is still enough sunlight left in the land of the rising sun for drying off that shirt.

      Wish it were that easy. Sometimes those stains are hard to get out.

      Delete
  3. I didnt read the title at first and when I got to the bottom i was like wtf is goin on here.

    I read some of the other posts on this subject this week and yours was probably the most interesting one of em all. The other one was one of those tldr kinda posts.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you and hello.

      'Macro Smacks' are more than just a perfunctory positive remark regarding extraordinary dexterity displayed by a foreigner using chopsticks...words will never hurt me because they brush off so easily. Water off a duck's back.

      But those sticks and stones do break bones and have a tendency to sink to the bottom line. "You might have the cash but you can...not cash in your face"- one of the songs that's been going through my head the last few days.

      Even though I grew up listening to his music, I'm only starting to understand the lyrics. Jammin' till the break of dawn.

      Thanks again for stopping by Hardkore.
      Appreciate the nod.

      Delete